A couple with a big age gap: what do you think when you hear this phrase? Most likely, you have a clear opinion in this regard - and can now honestly say whether such a relationship is okay for you. Still, even in this day and age, it can hardly be found another topic where more prejudices are built... A mature guy dating a younger woman or the other way around - the fact remains - thousands of clichés will follow their romance no matter where exactly they go. At the same time, the best world psychologists question themselves: does age actually play such a crucial role in love?
To get closer to the answer, we need to figure out how many years of difference are generally considered perfect in our society. Luckily, the University of California dedicated its researchers to this topic too. So they could survey more than 2500 people between 18 and 67 years old. The results of this study were pretty intriguing.
More than half of all male respondents have no objection to a younger partner. While females - clearly give their preferences to older boyfriends.
Although let's take a closer look at men first. 57% of interviewees don't mind being more mature than their girlfriends. At the same time, 43% of them see an age difference of one to five years optimal, albeit - the rest consider that a lady can be six to twelve years younger.
And what about girls? 35% find a difference of one to five years ideal, while in the opinion of the rest - having a boyfriend six to twelve years older is a great option. More curious is that only 15% of all female respondents said they could imagine dating a younger guy. They see an increased potential for conflicts in such romances.
Did you get enough numbers until now? We guess so, at least. And at this point, you probably think, "I'm interested in dating a woman 10 years younger than me. I need something more helpful than statistics and research!" We perfectly understand you, dear friend, and can give you all the information you want. Just keep reading to discover the advantages and disadvantages of a relationship like this. As well as tips on making it work and much more. So, you're welcome!
Why do men want to date women 10 years younger?
You certainly know some couples with a noticeable age gap. Sure: this is nothing unusual in the century of tolerance and acceptance, but these lovebirds' feelings still raise many questions. Demonstrates a younger woman dating an older man, her mental problems? Why is a mature guy attracted to a lady of her age? Can such a romance always work, or do the success chances depend on certain conditions? The list can go further... And, unfortunately, we can't hold you so long to answer them all. Thus, in this section of our article, we'll focus on the second one.
Although before we say anything - we want you to take a few seconds and find some explanations in your mind. Do not cheat! Don't read our answers yet! Okay, have you come up with a few ideas? Awesome! Now, we can finally share the official top-three reasons that provoke males to fall in love with a younger woman. Have fun reading!
Young ladies are attractive.
First and foremost, we have to say mature females are hot, gorgeous, and charming, too. Anyway, males tend to be exceptionally captivated by younger girls. Experts think this has to do with the way they dress and act. Because inexperienced women behave more freely and open-mindedly.
Young ladies make men forget their age.
Indeed, most people are not genuinely happy and excited, realizing they are getting older daily. When you are young, it seems like you have all the time in the world and shouldn't hurry. But one day, this impression will disappear, and everything will change. From that moment, you'll start thinking about how fast time flies and how quickly you grow old. Dating a woman 10 years younger than you can help you forget the age written on your ID card.
Young ladies need advisors.
When two people about the same age date, neither of them will have a chance to be the smarter one. Of course, they both have experienced different things in life, but no one has an advantage. On the other hand, when a man is 10 years older than his girlfriend, he has a chance to become a wise advisor for her. He has a pleasant opportunity to guide her through life.
Without a doubt, there are many more reasons that make men look for younger partners. Many of these grounds are very personal - the point remains, though - it's a really good idea!
Dating a woman 10 years younger: pros and cons
You already know that men generally tend to date women of the same age or younger. While for women, the nuance of being older than their boyfriends will definitely be a deal breaker. Why is that? The above mentioned preferences are a product of evolution! These expectations of a relationship are, in fact, partly primal instincts.
Anyway, the prejudices in this respect could fill pages. You might think now, "She's 10 years younger than me... What makes her want me? Is she only after my money or other material advantages?" At the same time, the lady's thoughts could sound, "He is undoubtedly not too serious about me..." However, don't worry: the clichés from your subconscious rarely correspond to reality. Because there are good reasons why people fall in love with each other, even if there are ten years between them.
Look at celebrities: the President of France (Emmanuel Macron) and his wife Brigitte, George and Amal Clooney... There is a 25 and 17 years difference between their couples, and they are still happy together! These guys clearly know all the advantages and disadvantages of an unequal marriage. Good news: since you consider dating someone only 10 years younger, you'll, most likely, face significantly fewer misunderstandings.
Still, we suggest you read the pros and cons such a romance brings to realize if the game is worth the candle here.
ProsA younger partner = more energy
One of the main benefits of dating a woman 10 years younger is her inexhaustible energy. So every time you are near her, she'll motivate you to stay active and show that you, too, prefer a busy lifestyle.
Your ladies are always excited about doing something instead of sitting on a couch and watching TV. Trying new things, as a rule, belongs to their favorite activities. Thus, trust us, when being in a couple with one of them, you'll get back the feeling that something unbelievably thrilling awaits you each new day.
Younger females are usually described as people who are constantly in motion. In contrast to older women, they like doing sports and easily manage to be in better shape. This is also the reason why they hardly have any serious health problems.
A younger partner = more positive in a relationship
There are many examples of couples with a 10 years age gap, where the fact - a younger partner brings positive vibes to the life of the older one changes a lot in a good way.
You remember that such girls usually have more energy. So their thirst for life is emphasized through various adventures and other free time activities. Although there is something else that makes them look forward to each day that lies ahead.
Younger ladies do not expect bad things to happen to them: thanks to their optimism, the future seems bright. Therefore, when having a romance with one of them, you will be taught to notice plenty of reasons to take positive thoughts with you wherever you go.
A younger partner = the feeling of being desired again.
You must agree: when a mature guy is approached by someone, it's usually a female of his own age. And that is, in every respect, understandable. Isn't it sufficient proof of how attractive and charming a man is? Unfortunately not - there is something that can make him feel even more desirable. We talk about dating a woman ten years younger, of course.
When such a girl shows interest in you, that's something you won't ever ignore. This is long-awaited proof of your sex appeal and a situation that can boost your ego. It gives the feeling of being desired again, notwithstanding age.
Just think about it: the young lady's interest shows that you are even more good-looking than the guys of her generation. Your self-esteem will be very thankful if you give this relationship a try.
A younger partner = less drama.
Mature women have probably experienced many difficult situations in life. All challenges they went through - left scars on their hearts and fears in their heads. These worries are genuinely tricky to deal with. Moreover, plenty of grown-up females don't want to take their concerns into their own hands... By doing this, they hope to protect themselves from obsessive ex-boyfriends or husbands, problems at work, or anything else an older woman might suffer from. Evidently: not all ladies of your age carry such emotional baggage with them, but why should you take this risk?
Let's take a look at younger girls. If you get into a relationship with one of them, you'll experience less drama. A girlfriend like this has fewer issues of the past to deal with. Thus, if you want your partner to bring something new and refreshing into your life - the decision is clear. Even when talking about dating a woman 10 years younger with young children - this attitude won't change.
A younger partner = better prospects for the future.
Many mature men are single at their age, not because they planned their lives that way. Are you among those who dreamed of starting a family with a girl you love? If yes, we are sorry that every partner you had turned out to be the wrong choice after all. Still, you shouldn't think our chances of finding the special one are now slimmer than ever!
We guess you realize that dating a woman of your age won't bring you the prospects for the future you expect to get. Even if she wants to have children, the probability of getting pregnant is lower. For this reason, we suggest you focus on attracting a younger lady. Most likely, she also wants to get married and give birth to children. So this choice will make things easier for both of you.
ConsA younger partner = gossip.
It is hard to argue that public opinion is a powerful and effective weapon that can ruin someone's life. No matter how self-confident you are, there is still a chance that the words of relatives, friends, and work colleagues will harm your relationship. In particular, if you want to attract a lady who's 10 years younger than you...
There is no secret that if a man is mature and wealthy, people in his social circle often don't believe that such a young woman dates him because of pure love. They think she cares about her financial security, beneficial connections, or other similar things instead. So you must be prepared to prove they are wrong.
Bear in mind: evil tongues are worse than wicked hands. But if your relationship is based on fondness and understanding - don't listen to what others say.
A younger partner = different social circles.
Couples with a 10 years age gap often experience difficulties building a shared circle of friends. Commonly, the younger partner is not willingly accepted by the mature buddies of her boyfriend. The older partner, meanwhile, in many cases, feels uncomfortable with his girlfriend's mates.
Sure: you may not be interested in what your woman's fellows are fascinated by. Your lady, as well, may not want to keep up a conversation with your companions and spend Friday evening in your favorite pub. Spending time separately from time to time is absolutely okay. It mustn't always be like this, though. Otherwise, such a pastime may end in love collapse.
A younger partner = dissimilar needs and desires.
Differences can be exciting and make the relationship piquant. But they can also affect you in a bad way. Because when different generations meet, it is not uncommon for partners to have little in common. Thus, if you wonder, "I want to start dating women 10 years+ younger than me, what should I be prepared for?" The answer is apparent: contrasting needs and desires you have may ruin everything.
Most likely, the younger girlfriend has her whole life ahead. She probably wants to experience mind-blowing things, travel, develop professionally, or even move to another city. As an older one, you have already gone through plenty of thrilling events in your life. And if you now long for peace and constancy in your routine - that can be a problem.
A younger partner = skepticism of her parents.
Just imagine: your girl's mother dreamed of a handsome and young son-in-law. In her fantasies, it wasn't a man slightly younger than herself in a couple with her daughter! Therefore, yes, there may be disagreements with your lady's parents, but you may still be able to avoid them.
Friendly tip: a mother and a father need to live with the confidence that their sweet child is together with a reliable man. So your job is to demonstrate how loyal you are toward her.
In the first stages of the romance, the age gap will be the reason for skepticism. But as soon as your woman's relatives see her happy, shining eyes - they will calm down.
A younger partner = other values.
People of different generations grew up in different times and are shaped by various values. In couples with a noticeable age gap (most commonly), the older partner tries to teach the younger one life. He finds his views more rational. And, according to the ladies who dated men 10 years older, that's where disagreements arise.
Mature guys are not always ready to look for compromises. They consider they are right because of their significant life experience. Although a young girl might also think correctly in many matters, she merely needs an opportunity to show it! Thus, don't make this mistake if you don't want your lady to feel your unwillingness to heed her interests.
Tips on dating a woman 10 years younger
A big age difference between partners is often recognized as one of the frequent reasons for separation. Understand us right: there's nothing wrong with falling in love with someone younger than you. Nothing can stop sincere affection - it's clear. However, on our part, we want to warn you of certain challenges such couples usually have to encounter. So you and your beloved one may successfully overcome them. Just keep these ten tips in mind.
To-do list#1. Be sincere and tolerant
If you are interested in attracting and dating younger women, be prepared for a tricky phase of your romance. Sooner or later, you and your lady will start having doubts concerning your relationship. The seeds of doubt about whether this can actually work may be planted by practically everyone. The only relatively safe stage is when you are newly in love.
Why is it so dangerous, then? Because too much stress and routine are destructive for couples, in particular - for those with an age gap. The point is to get out of it before your girl begins to question herself, "Do I still love him?"
The solution here is to always communicate openly and honestly. If you feel something went wrong - simply talk about it! Most likely, you and your lady merely need a bit of fresh air and more time together as a couple.
#2. Build up trust
Have you heard something about the fear of loss? Great if you have since it's a common issue for couples with a big age difference. It's understandable, though. The older partner lives in constant dread of being left for a hotter guy of his woman's age. While the younger partner worries about the health of the special one. At the same time, such a lady is usually suspicious concerning more mature females in her boyfriend's social circle (because they have more in common).
Therefore, it's crucial to build up trust to avoid misinterpretations. You can't manage that without sincerity and tolerance, though...
#3. Cope with different phases of life
Naturally, couples with an age gap are always in different phases of life. A classic example: a younger woman is still studying and wants to have children, while the older guy has long been working and already has grown-up kids. The same goes for leisure activities. Youth is generally more active, which involves parties or doing more sports. Mature males, on the other hand, prefer evenings at home or can no longer keep up physically with some workouts.
What we are trying to say, it's essential to come to terms with different phases of your lives and learn to accept each other. Both need a bit of freedom to implement the ideas into life.
#4. Discuss the future
Your couple can't succeed without clearly defined plans for the future. Don't smirk! The 10 years age gap not only creates challenges in the here and now. But it can also put a strain on your shared tomorrow.
To avoid disappointment and frustration, you should speak your mind clearly from the first day of a romance. How do you imagine growing old together? Do you want to have children? Where do you want to live? Who earns money when you retire? These and many other questions shouldn't be left without answers.
#5. Make sure you spend time alone with each other
This one of the tips for dating a woman 10 years younger hardly differs from the general recommendations of relationship experts. Time together as a couple is significant - search for such possibilities whenever possible. Every moment alone counts! This creates the basis for strong feelings over time despite the age difference. Experienced intimacy and other joint activities form a powerful bond between you two and will only strengthen.
Not-to-do list#1. Build the relationship under the influence of cliches
You have probably heard dozens of clichés about relationships between a younger girl and an older guy. Especially when deciding on dating Ukrainian women, you'll suffer from stereotypes around this undertaking.
The resolution is obvious - defend yourself against all the prejudices, and do not act as society expects you to! Above all, you and your lady need to communicate on the same level, despite all the differences. Falling into father-daughter roles can quickly become a reason for a breakup.
#2. Forget about compromises
The bigger the age difference, the more distinct the needs and interests of the partners are. So don't worry - a 10 year gap is not the worst case. Anyway, if you want to ruin everything - forget about compromises. Without responding to the wishes of both partners - your couple can't achieve happiness.
A compromise does not have to be found for everything, though. As mentioned before, accept your different circles of friends and hobbies. It is not a sign of alienation if you can continue doing what you like. Mutual trust will do the rest.
#3. Continuously think about your age
How old are you? Say it out loud and repeat it a few times. Dating someone younger isn't a good idea if you continuously think about your age and blame yourself for being born too early.
Are you a bit confused now? Well, then, you need to learn to perceive your age as just a number first. Your lady might be 21, but she acts like a 31-year-old, while you may try to behave like you are as old as she is from time to time. It all depends on your personality and the character of your partner. So never mind it.
#4. Try to save the relationship no matter what
In other words: give your best to save the relationship only if you have a good reason.
Remember not to date a younger woman just to boost your self-esteem or seem cooler in the eyes of your buddies. Even if your crush is the Miss Universe or a Hollywood celebrity - this is wrong and unfair to her. In addition, in the end, you will undoubtedly get tired of a romance with someone you don't love.
#5. See this relationship as something extraordinary
If you and your girlfriend have a 10-year age gap, this does not mean that your couple is somehow phenomenal. The fact she was born later than you is not a barrier. You have the same pleasures and the same problems as many other couples.
Never think that your love is wrong! In hard moments, we suggest you ask for support from your relatives, friends, or colleagues. It will be much easier for you two to have understanding people around your couple.
Conclusion
Today we were talking about couples with a 10 year age difference. This subject concerns many men because they usually ask themselves, "What should motivate a young woman in her mid-30s to look for a significantly older partner?" These doubts are clear since many single men between the ages of 30 and 35 are attractive and charming. We can say here one thing: true love knows no numbers. And if your potential younger girlfriend demonstrates emotional maturity, what stops you from asking her out? Exactly: only your insecurities. So give your happiness a chance!
Dating with 10-year age gap FAQ
Is the 10-year age gap too much?
Without a doubt, the 10 year gap is more noticeable than 2 or 5 years, but it's still nothing critical. With mutual love and respect, you can make this relationship work.
Can a 10-year age difference work?
Of course! If you follow our tips, avoid common mistakes, and forget about all cliches in this regard, you can live with your 10 years younger wife happily ever after.
Is it okay to date a woman 10 years younger?
If you and this woman want to build a relationship - why not? Don't listen to what other people say: only your emotions are important.
Is a 10-year age gap OK for marriage?
Yes, it's more than okay. In some countries, marriages with such an age difference between spouses are highly welcome. For example, Spanish or Russian women search for older partners exactly for this reason.